A bit of humor

#11
vince said:
Here's another one to brighten your day,

Three traders and three investors were going for a trip by train. Before the journey, the investors bought 3 tickets but the market makers only bought one. The investors were glad that the stupid traders were going to pay a fine. However, when the conductor was approaching their compartment, all three market makers went to the toilet. The conductor, noticing that somebody was in the toilet, knocked on the door. In reply he saw a hand with one ticket. He checked it and the traders saved 2/3 of the ticket price. The next day, the investors decided to use the same strategy- they bought only one ticket. The traders did not buy any tickets at all! When the investors saw the conductor, they went straight for the toilet, and when they heard the knocking they handed in their one ticket. They did not get it back. The traders took it and went to the other toilet!
LoL! :D
 
#13
vince said:
Here's another one to brighten your day,

Three traders and three investors were going for a trip by train. Before the journey, the investors bought 3 tickets but the market makers only bought one. The investors were glad that the stupid traders were going to pay a fine. However, when the conductor was approaching their compartment, all three market makers went to the toilet. The conductor, noticing that somebody was in the toilet, knocked on the door. In reply he saw a hand with one ticket. He checked it and the traders saved 2/3 of the ticket price. The next day, the investors decided to use the same strategy- they bought only one ticket. The traders did not buy any tickets at all! When the investors saw the conductor, they went straight for the toilet, and when they heard the knocking they handed in their one ticket. They did not get it back. The traders took it and went to the other toilet!
lol lol :D :D :D
 
#15
Men on earth die and go to heaven.

God comes and says," I want the men to form two queues- one line for the men who dominated their women, and the other one for the men who were dominated by their women. Also, I want all the women to go away so that no man and woman can talk."

Next time God comes back, the women are gone, and there are two
lines.The line for the men who were dominated by their women is 100 miles long, and in the line of men who dominated their women there is only one man.

God gets mad and says, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves. I created you in my image, and you were all whipped by your mates. Look at the only one of my sons who stood up and made me proud. Learn from him! Tell them, my son, how did you manage to be the only one in this line?"
The man replies, "I don't know, my wife told me to stand here."
 
#16
mohandee said:
Men on earth die and go to heaven.

God comes and says," I want the men to form two queues- one line for the men who dominated their women, and the other one for the men who were dominated by their women. Also, I want all the women to go away so that no man and woman can talk."

Next time God comes back, the women are gone, and there are two
lines.The line for the men who were dominated by their women is 100 miles long, and in the line of men who dominated their women there is only one man.

God gets mad and says, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves. I created you in my image, and you were all whipped by your mates. Look at the only one of my sons who stood up and made me proud. Learn from him! Tell them, my son, how did you manage to be the only one in this line?"
The man replies, "I don't know, my wife told me to stand here."
lol lol lol :D :D :D
 
#17
vince said:
Here's another one to brighten your day,

Three traders and three investors were going for a trip by train. Before the journey, the investors bought 3 tickets but the market makers only bought one. The investors were glad that the stupid traders were going to pay a fine. However, when the conductor was approaching their compartment, all three market makers went to the toilet. The conductor, noticing that somebody was in the toilet, knocked on the door. In reply he saw a hand with one ticket. He checked it and the traders saved 2/3 of the ticket price. The next day, the investors decided to use the same strategy- they bought only one ticket. The traders did not buy any tickets at all! When the investors saw the conductor, they went straight for the toilet, and when they heard the knocking they handed in their one ticket. They did not get it back. The traders took it and went to the other toilet!
Nice one Vince. Hilarious :D :D
 
#18
Two women were walking through the woods when a frog called out to them and said: "Help me, ladies! I am a stockbroker who, through an evil witch's curse, has been transformed into a frog. If one of you will kiss me, I'll be returned to my former state!"

One woman took out her purse, grabbed the frog, and stuffed it inside her handbag. The other woman, aghast, screamed, "Didn't you hear him? If you kiss him, he'll turn into a stockbroker!"

The second woman replied, "Sure, but these days a talking frog is worth more than a stockbroker!"
 
#19
Another one here !!!

A stock analyst and a Dalal Street broker went to the races. The broker suggested to bet Rs 10,000 on a horse. The analyst was sceptical, saying that he wanted first to understand the rules, to look on horses, etc. The broker whispered that he knew a secret algorithm for the success, but he could not convince the analyst.

"You are too theoretical," he said and bet on a horse. Surely, that horse came first bringing him a lot of money. Triumphantly, he exclaimed: "I told you, I knew the secret!"

"What is your secret?" the analyst asked.

"It is rather easy. I have two kids, three and five year old. I sum up their ages and I bet on number nine."

"But, three and five is eight," the analyst protested.

"I told you, you are too theoretical!" the broker replied, "Haven't I just shown experimentally that my calculation is correct?!"
 

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