Saving a suicide

sh50

Active Member
#1
Preventing a suicide

Last week, we received too many suicide death news in Delhi. There were 6 suicides and 300 attempted suicides because of the fear of the board exams. Three days later another girl committed suicide because of the same reason. Last year three students committed suicide because of not getting admission in the right college. On December 10,2001 one person by the name of Amit Punya killed himself because of not being good at maths. In the year 2000 or 2001, I remember reading in the Times of India that 2279 students killed themselves all over India because of the awesome board exams. Last year on the ezboard forum also I read somebody commenting that the stupid perception of everything hinging on one exam was causing so many suicides. Today in the speaking tree(spiritual column of the times of India), a collective Japanese suicide is mentioned because there is nobody to listen empathetically. I finally decided to write this.

I would like to share certain insights because I have read some articles to the effect that in the 21st century, depression could be the no1 killer disease because though science has made tremendous progress, the psychological and spiritual development of man has not kept abreast. My worst suffering was two decades ago but what I learnt is worth sharing.

Before going to details, I would like to state what to my mind is a typical suicide. Somewhere in the late eighties, I was going to train one person on computerized accounting. After giving him a briefing, I told him to report on time the next morning. When he did not turn up for more than an hour of commencement time, I rang up his residence and was shocked to hear that he had committed suicide. When I rushed to his residence with some office people, I still remember his father with tears rolling down his cheeks, Only yesterday he seemed totally all right. How can one gauge what he is thinking.? In the last 25 years, I must have read at least 10 suicides with more or less the same remark, How do you know what exactly he is thinking. That guy had an affair with some girl and lost her but the issue is that that happens to many of us but all of us do not react like that. If the person does not speak, how does one know how bad he feels about whatever may have happened.

There is no X-ray or thermometer here to know the degree of Negative thinking or sometimes even the fact that the person is thinking negatively. In technical lingo, there is no indicator. Many people have been raving about Sanjay Leela Bhansalis new film Black. Based on the life of Hellen Keller, its about how a girl who is blind, deaf and dumb comes to terms with life with the help of her teacher, the redoubtable Amitabh Bachchan. Mr Bachchan in one dialogue tells the girls parents So what if the girl is blind, deaf and dumb. She is not mentally retarded . Depression and mental problems are exactly the opposite So what if everything is all right on the surface. What if there is some mental disability or false perception which is invisible. That actually makes it more dangerous.

We will digress a little here. Mr Bachchans remark reminded me of something. One must also add talk about stigma related to mental problems. Some years ago I happened to go to a school of mentally retarded children not too far away from where I stay. A photo of Albert Einstein who was suffering from dyslexia but still rose to greatness here was hanging on the reception. The receptionist told me that they deliberately hung the Einstein photo to reassure parents that all was not lost. Einstein apart, Thomas Edison, Woodrow Wilson, Winston Churchill and even Tom Cruise were said to one or the other mental l problem. Even USAs greatest president, Abraham Lincoln suffered two nervous breakdowns before he became what he became. Thats a pretty handsome crowd. What stigma?

I am doing this in public interest like the post on Vipasana Meditation earlier since human lives are involved. Since many people dont even know that depression is a sickness, one should be generally aware. This time I have not written long because of natural proclivity to write but the nature of the subject. Since this forum is not meant for all this, continuation is in dep.doc for those genuiely interested.

I wrote to times of week India a week ago, in which student suicides are covered specifically. I dont expect a stressed out board exam student to be reading all this but maybe somebody can help one indirectly. That is in the file student.doc
A word of caution. One should try to change the social ambience of the student before doing anything and always take help of medical practitioners. Feeling low and depressed is two different things. Depression is a sickness.
I am not a medical guy but sometimes sharing experience helps
 
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sh50

Active Member
#2
Another seventeen year old economics student killed himself going by todays(5/3/2005)papers. What a great pity and strange that with all the amenities young people are killing themselves. Though I have not mentioned this above, a few years ago I read about a Japanese grandfather tell his drug addictJapanese grandson, We and the Germans had to rebuild the nation after the second world war. You have everything and yet you are doing all this . Almost reminds you of stock market irrationality.

On a serious note, I really wonder why Delhi has become so prone to suicides and not the rest of India. Extreme cold can aggravate such problems but that is in December- January. I have written to newspapers/ magazines earlier too whenever I have read about student suicides but they dont respond. Thought maybe this might help. It is really very tragic. I remember my pathetic situation 25 years ago and I really wonder how many lives this will claim.

Why cant young people be allowed to do what they want to do instead of thrusting subjects on them. Looking at the Indian Idols, if supposing there was a borad exam of singing and sports also which one had to clear. I wonder how the intelligent people from IITs and IIMs would fare. In school we used to have something called SUPW which implied socially useful productive work for things like music, carpentary, electronics etc.. We used to joke that it actually stood for some useful periods wasted. . In real life it becomes tragic when on such individuals you force studies. I can only share what I know(Oshos extract):-

Be an individual if you want to be happy. If you want to be happy, start choosing on your own. Everybody is being dragged and manipulated. So nobody knows, what is ones destiny. What really you wanted to do, you have forgotten. Then how you can be happy. Somebody who could have been a poet is just a moneylender. Somebody who could have been a painter is a doctor. Somebody who could have been a good doctor is a businessman. Everybody is displaced. Everybody is doing something that he never wanted to do. Hence Unhappiness. Happiness happens when you fit with your life. When you fit so harmoniously that whatever you are doing is your joy. Then suddenly you come to know that meditation follows you. If you love the work that you are doing, if you love the way you are living, then you are meditative. Then nothing distracts you. When things distract you, it shows that you are not really interested in those things.

"Basic thing is to search for why you are unhappy . The man may have been a beautiful dancer and he is in the office, piling away files. Instead of dancing, he keeps accumulating bank balance and says that he is unhappy and therefore wants some meditation. I can give him. How will it help him. It will only enable him to pursue his activity with relaxation. That is what TM is doing. It may reduce stress but it will not change you. .It is deemed that happiness comes when one is meditative; it was just the other way around- Meditation comes when you are happy. But to be happy is difficult but to learn meditation is easy"

To my mind, the education system suits only a certain category of students but has been imposed on the rest. We know through optimization how each share needs a separate strategy ; they why not each individual. The human being is far more complex(prejdices, complexes, beliefs etc) then a share which can be relatively deemed more objective.

I would again reiterate that desptie our own stalwarts- Vivekanand, Aurobindo , Osho and Kirshnamurthy saying good things about correct education and the word "Swadharma" mentioned in our shastras, such suicides happen. Its both the failure of the ecuation system and the information revolution and mass communication.
 
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#3
Why has the youth suicide rate gone so high in recent years?

It's easier to get the tools for suicide (Boys often use firearms to kill themselves; girls usually use pills);
the pressures of modern life are greater;
competition for good grades and college admission is stiff; and
there's more violence in the newspapers and on television.

Lack of parental interest may be another problem. Many children grow up in divorced households; for others, both of their parents work and their families spend limited time together. According to one study 90 percent of suicidal teen-agers believed their families did not understand them. (However, this is such a common teen-age complaint that other factors are playing a role, too.) Young people also reported that when they tried to tell their parents about their feelings of unhappiness or failure, their mother and father denied or ignored their point of view.

If your teen-ager has been depressed, you should look closely for signs that he or she might be thinking of suicide:

Has his personality changed dramatically?
Is he having trouble with a girlfriend (or, for girls, with a boyfriend)? Or is he having trouble getting along with other friends or with parents? Has he withdrawn from people he used to feel close to?
Is the quality of his schoolwork going down? Has he failed to live up to his own or someone else's standards (when it comes to school grades, for example)?
Does he always seem bored, and is he having trouble concentrating?
Is he acting like a rebel in an unexplained and severe way?
Is she pregnant and finding it hard to cope with this major life change?
Has he run away from home?
Is your teen-aager abusing drugs and/or alcohol?
Is she complaining of headaches, stomachaches, etc., that may or may not be real?
Have his eating or sleeping habits changed?
Has his or her appearance changed for the worse?
Is he giving away some of his most prized possessions?
Is he writing notes or poems about death?
Does he talk about suicide, even jokingly? Has he said things such as, "That's the last straw," "I can't take it anymore," or "Nobody cares about me?" (Threatening to kill oneself precedes four out of five suicidal deaths.)
Has he tried to commit suicide before?


If you suspect that your teen-ager might be thinking about suicide, do not remain silent. Suicide is preventable, but you must act quickly.

Ask your teen-ager about it. Don't be afraid to say the word "suicide." Getting the word out in the open may help your teen-ager think someone has heard his cries for help.
Reassure him that you love him. Remind him that no matter how awful his problems seem, they can be worked out, and you are willing to help.
Ask her to talk about her feelings. Listen carefully. Do not dismiss her problems or get angry at her.
Remove all lethal weapons from your home, including guns, pills, kitchen utensils and ropes.
Seek professional help. Ask your teen-ager's pediatrician to guide you. A variety of outpatient and hospital-based treatment programs are available.

"Save Youth : the Future... the Treasure... the Hope. - nkpanjiyar"
 
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sh50

Active Member
#4
Thats a professional response and we should all be deeply greatful since suicidal tendencies are invisible.

I am not a medical pro and I can only speak from personal experiences about student suicides.

I would like to mention here that even well established people do not like to take chances with their careers. Recently Shoaib Akhtar said about not coming to India, I am not afraid but unfit. I will not compromise as it is my career I remember cricketer Mohinder Amarnath used to tie a handerchief for luck and I read that Virendra Schewagg does something similar. I also read somewhere that Saurav Ganguly wore Harbajhan singhs shoes in a match for luck. We have Ekta kapoor, Rakesh Roshan and Karan Johar all naming their films/serials after K for luck. If well established people are so careful, is it a wonder how a fearful childs perception would be. I have already mentioned global warming vested interests in the "How's the weather up there post"?

When I faced the board exams exactly twenty five years ago, I spent the whole of 1980 in which I could have committed suicide anytime(especially exams and vacation) though my parents still dont know it. When we come across such articles, they realize how bad the situation was then.

I would particularly like to throw light on

Young people also reported that when they tried to tell their parents about their feelings of unhappiness or failure, their mother and father denied or ignored their point of view.
Several times in 1980, my father tried to explain to me how practical life was different and how he would rather hire a third class graduate with a smart personality rather than a first class graduate with a poor personality. Considering that cricketers Irfan Pathan and Balaji got the same number of wickets in Pakistan last year, it is true because Irfan got far more endorsements though Balajis achievements were recognized. Now if you say this to a child who is poor both intelligence wise and personality wise in a fear crazed mood, it can fuel rather than prevent suicide. So one has to be circumspect depending upon the child and his mood.

I think what my father meant was that practical intelligence in life is more important than academic intelligence but could not convey it convincingly. Today if I were to explain the same to a student, it would be like this:-

Both the people who got nobel prize awards for DNA and the computer chip where not conventionally good at their subjects nor exceptionally qualified.. The problem with well qualified people is that some of them tend to be too egoistic and creative thoughts do not come. As they say in spirituality, If the cup is already full, how much more you can pour . Blind obsession of qualifications in todays competitive scenario is bound to lead to trouble. Subhash Ghai qualified as an actor but became a director, Rakesh Roshan also came as an actor but was more successful as a director, Salim Khan came in as an actor but became a writer. In the book, The making of Sholay he says, I had the gift of conception but not the gift of projection . You have to know what gift you have which a mere piece of paper( qualification) cannot determine- Manushya karm isliye karta hai taaki use apni pehchaan se pehchaan ho

Recently, cricketer Rahul Dravid mentioned how young people try to start as allrounders but when they come across a tough wicket, they realize that bowling is not their cup of tea. I have even heard of the term bowler all rounder. In the history of cricket, the percentage of genuinely good allrounders as a percentage of total no of cricketers is negligible- to my mind we have produced two in over 70 years of cricket- Kapil Dev and Vinoo Mankad. So blind fear of qualifications and all round excellence both for parents and students is idiotic. Qualifications act more as a hedge at times. Intelligence comes in niches and you must recognize your niche. My wife, a nursery teacher was telling me how in American school where she is applying, even the tiny tots were allowed freedom to explore but the Indian system was more teacher centric even at that stage. In Reader's Digest, An article, "Do you need a career doctor" tackles job misfit problems at high school itself; preventing competition suicide would be a bi product. Trading is not the only thing we have to learn from USA.

A word on teachers; one comes across articles/programmes on how some of them force tutions on students to earn an extra buck. In my view, its better to train them as vocational psychologists as well and desingn some lateral thinnkng pay for them from the child's emoluments when he grows up. It's a small price to pay if it prevents job misfits and competiition suicides.

I keep referring to one of my bosses who got six promotions in one year. We used to think he was a super allrounder but he himself admitted once that he would hate to be a works manager and handle labor despite being a very good engineer. When he started his business, he deliberately gave equal partnership to all partners(3) though on merit he could have easily grabbed 75-80%.He told me at that time that he would make more money in the long run. He also said that one cannot be at all places at all times even if good at multiple functions.After 3 years, he not only achieved that but had CEOs of big companies expressing surprise as to how 5 men in one company could achieve what 25 could not in in another. I am not suggesting that everybody do this but this is what I called voluntary and responsible socialism but in our context, having blind fear of qualification when practical life is totally different is trying to be bearish when you should be bullish. I will again reiterate literal meaning of competition " seeking together"

I got frightened out of my life when I realized in 1978 that to be a chartered accountant one has to study for 20 hours and then also people fail. My father being a successful CA, CA being a somewhat glamorous tqualification at that time, I was tempted to follow in his footsteps. I would hear tales of how people would attempt 14 times, 16 times in one case even 30 times and even then fail. There would be stories of how children grow up to be matriculates while the father is still slogging at CA and his wife says, Darling/.Papa, paper achchaa kar ke aana. Somebody even told me that he had heard of a father and son giving exam together. There is a perception that the concerned authorities deliberately take out a percentage of (4)the result. If true, can one blame the students for killing themselves? Future should witness more suicides because of the kind of inducements television and advertisement provide and the impatience of the young people today.

Coming to the point, my father though a CA is quite lousy at accounts but good at certain finance issues-shares, income-tax, cash flow. Its all about finding one niche . It is strange that we do not have killer instinct in professional sports but the same is becoming more and more apparent in student life.

To solve any problem one has to use both method and motive. Even spiritual leaders say tackle the cause and not the effect and deal with the problem while it is small.. Unless false perceptions are known and removed, other measures have cosmetic effect in my view.

The other thing mentioned is
Reassure him that you love him
- this is very very important as the childs self esteem is rock bottom, What happens if I fail. What will everybody think?. Comparisons with cousins and friends especially avoided. When my father used to suggest that I study with my friends(something that he used to do) , I would flatly refuse because I had begun to see them as rivals and I was so fearful that I didnt want to be proved inferior at anything. I do feel that relatives have a role to play; my situation got out of control because my cousins were away in Bombay and Ahmedabad and I would battle negative thoughts throughout without getting anywhere. Although the concerned person talking is very important to change moods, today we have tools like Yahoo conference where relatives from other cities and even abroad can do online chat to reassure the child that it is not a completely ruthless, competitive, impersonal world and they would still be relatives even if he does not do well. He should be encouraged to communicate all the time- both to change moods and to know what exactly he is thinking.

Some of this may seem farfetched to some of you but if you have ever literally experienced There is nothing to fear but fear itself , it would not be so. Today, I am a veteran of half a dozen health battles but that year of the board exam still sends a chill through my spine. One cannot just sit and do nothing and so at the risk of exposing myself, I had to do it since lives are involved. What is the point of having a fantastic medium like the internet unless we use it to good effect-Message is more important than the medium. Unless we share experiences, we are no better than our Ancestors just because of having internet. At least at traderji, we should trade experiences.

PN-nkpanjiyar; my yahoo id is [email protected] Please get in touch. I would be greatful if you post this in other forums as well. If you don't do it, I will in your name.
 
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#5
Dear sh50,

Though long but its a pleasure reading all your posts. I too had suffered from depression during school and college days for almost 6 years, so, very sensitive and thoughtful in such cases and incidents.

Its really privilege to be part of this forum and gain so much of informations and knowledge from senior and experienced people especially from you, Traderji, arun, TATrader, CreditViolet and from many others. All their posts are really educating.

Thanks & Regards,
nkpanjiyar
 
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sh50

Active Member
#6
Thanks for the compliment. This time the subject made it inevitably long. You too are a welcome addition and have contributed handsomely both in education and entertainment. Keep it up.

Do I have your permission to post that "prevention suicide " post in other forums in your name or you want to do it yourself. I might as well tell you. There is an www.india-issues.com at www.ezboard, the largest community network in the world. I have posted my suicide post their and I wish to put yours too as it seems more professional.

Talking of board exams, I recall reading once that there is some organization in Bangalore that speiclizes in dealing with board related suicides. It seems the best things in this forum are from Bangalore.

As for the long posts, in the markets too I am long(bullish) most of the time. Well, if someone like Anil Ambani can run a marathon, why can't I write one as long("God is in the details") as "long" as it is not nonsense. I am sure you don't mean it in the wrong way but :-

If some of you groan and moan
That my posts are as long as a marathon
If some want to react as if continuously interrupted by a phone(call)
If some want to react the way a bank reacts on nonrepayment of loan
You have the choice of leaving them alone or postpone
If something were seiously wrong, traderji won't condone
I don't have the Indian idol's voice or Amitabh Bachchan's baritone
Everybody has different skills; its upto them how they hone.
Even sportmen pull out all stops for being in the zone.

Just for the record, just as there is trend and countertrend, a majority of posts are written to evoke a response following Newton's third law of motion. I read somewhere that great things have happened in history when people have come together and communicated. There should be a sense of history since none of our ancestors had such a medium. Great things may or may not happen, one can have a great time. I don't mean "pull out all stops" literally. I just enjoy writing actually-it's like breathing to me.

That again reminds me of something(this is how they become long). Recently, Tennis Star Sania Mirza when questioned about her biggest victory over the reigning US champion said," I just decided to go out and enjoy myself". Kapil Dev keeps telling Sachin Tendulkar, " Don't restrict yourself; enjoy yourself". Filmstar Dev Anand says" Nothing can give you a high as your own work" and we have students killing themselves because of this stupid obsession with thrusting subjects on them they don't feel comfortable with. Artists talk of orgasmic pleasure when lost in work. We can well imagine how awful the opposite experience can be. Any contrarian view? We should also "Enjoy the forum" though this post is contrarian to that.
 
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sh50

Active Member
#7
It is a coincidence that the program Indian idols has peaked at the same time with the suicides. In the finals they sing this song from the famous movie Qayaamat se qayaamat tak

Papa kahte hai badaa naam karega, Beta humara aisa kaam karega
Magar ye tau kio na jaane , ke meri manzil hai kahaan

I would like to rephrase the first line

Papa kahte hai konsa kaam karega, Beta hamara apna kaam karega

As for the second line, I would prefer to leave to our President Abdul Kalaam to awnser from The wings of fire

If you are a writer who would secretly prefer to be a lawyer or a doctor, your written words will feed but half the hunger of your readers; if you are a teacher who would rather be a businessman, your instructions will meet but half the need for knowledge of your students; if you are a scientist who hates science, your performance will satisfy but half the needs of your mission. The personal unhappiness and failure to achieve results that come from being a square peg in a round hole is not by any means new. In another part of the book Mr Kalam states, I myself would tell naviete engineering students that when they choose their specialization, the essential point to consider is whether the choice articulates their inner feelings and aspirations

One writer from the film Industry, Jaideep Sahni has a more apt description for square peg in a round hole . He describes it as lifetime imprisonment which is reflected in the life of his illustrious namesake, the late actor Balraj Sahni who himself had a torrid time before joining films. It is ironical that on the lover Devdas , nine movies have been made and on the Career Devdas not even one despite so many suicides and so many stalwarts talking about this.

One more thing deserves mention. Even the sub-vocation has to be right. Both Charles Dickens and Enid Blyton mentioned that they would be equally uncomfortable outside their own sphere of writing activity. We all know that every good one-day-cricketer need not become a good test cricketer and vice-versa. Even among actors, very few are genuinely versatile. Our own trading encourages us to discover our own style and mode.

What our honorable president has said corroborates with another song that the Indian idol finalists sing, Aaa dekhe zaraa, kisme kitnaa hai dum,jum ke rakhna kadam,mere saathi aa . Instead of kisme kitna it should be kisme konsa.:-

Agar apne bachcho ko banana chaho Jaise hai Indian idols Abhijit Saawant or Amit Saana
Chahe unko naa aata ho gaana
Dekho kis cheez me vo maahir hai, varna naani ke saath yaad aayenge naana
Extreme situation me ho sakta hai hamesha ke liye is duniya se pade Jaana

Ban gaye hai Indian idol Abhijit Saawant
Dekho kis vishay mein hai aapke bachche gunwant
Usi disha main unko lagaao turant
Aisa na ho ki kuch badnsaseebo ki tarah aatmahatya me unka ho ant

Agar aapke bachchon main hai kalaakar
Bahut zyaada paddai thopna hai bekaar
Suno apne bachcho ki pukaar/lalkaar
Aisa na ho ke vo bhi ho jaaye education system ke shikar

I ruined my life because of foolish pre-concieved notions and I sincerely feel that the education system should be more proactive the way it is in the USA. Otherwise:

Koi suicide faasi se karega, koi building se koodke jaan dedega
Jabtak education system nahin badlega
Kyoki educationists ye na jaane, ke unki manzil hai kahaan

I think the manzil hai kahaan deserves a bit elaboration. Spirituality is full of stuff on "know thyself". In real life too it can be pretty tough as some people change jobs and businesses for a lifetime without getting anywhere.

My dear friend, Jaideep will call me cynical but if any of you have felt cornered like a rat and contemplated serious suicide or read some of the student suicides in detail, you may have contrarian views. It sad that I have had to take a contrarian stand in this vis--vis the hilarious post at Antakshari ;cant be helped. If only the educationists take a contrarian view but then Who educates the educators
 
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#8
sh50 said:
Thanks for the compliment. This time the subject made it inevitably long. You too are a welcome addition and have contributed handsomely both in education and entertainment. Keep it up.

Do I have your permission to post that "prevention suicide " post in other forums in your name or you want to do it yourself. I might as well tell you. There is an www.india-issues.com at www.ezboard, the largest community network in the world. I have posted my suicide post their and I wish to put yours too as it seems more professional.

Talking of board exams, I recall reading once that there is some organization in Bangalore that speiclizes in dealing with board related suicides. It seems the best things in this forum are from Bangalore.
Please go ahead. Its your generosity that you have asked but actually there is no need for it. Good things has to be done without asking by anyone either by me or by you. Please share the information in other forums where it seems useful in your name. We are here to help each other.

Regards,
nkpanjiyar
 
#9
nkpanjiyar said:
Please go ahead. Its your generosity....... Please share the information in other forums where it seems useful in your name. We are here to help each other....
Nice thread here. Am liking what I see & please go ahead Hiren & nkpanjiyar. Am all ears. Oh! how I love these Earthly topics. They actually mean more & touch more to/on our lives.

Lives are lives my dear friends. The younger the more precious. Suicides are a big NO!!! forever in any society. And they are'nt happening only in Delhi. Pressures of today's world, exams, peer pressure, etc., etc., etc. Yes! Yes! Yes! and Yes!, but is anyone listening out there? I love LIFE in all it's manifestations. Plant & Animal Life mean the same to me. That's an honest & real admission. Am no religious buff either (take note please). In fact I'm a Roman Catholic Christian by practice (rather sceptical tho').

Fact is that I am an Animal lover in the extreme. To me, a Life is Life. Dog, Cat, Rat, Bird, Goat, Pig, Cockroach, Fly .... etc. are the same; Period:. Any takers here??? :cool: I have 14 cats, 2 Dogs & 1 Squirrel at home presently. I said Presently. A life member of the "Blue Cross of India", "SPCA"& "People for Animals" may explain things better.

Whenever you hear of a human suicide young or old, just think of the innumerable animal lives nipped at the bud as pups or kittens. That soothes me at least. Like I said before, Lives are Lives. We are the ones with the 6th sense & power of reasoning, are'nt we? Let's all do something about this when we can. More on this subject later. I've got to go now.
 

sh50

Active Member
#10
Jaideep, you remind me of Maneka Gandhi. All life is precious. No two doubts about that. There is an Akbar-birbal story in which birbal proves to the emperor how ones own life is dearest even vis--vis children. Strictly in that context, we should try and save our children first..

Today(8/3/2005), one more guy killed himself and this time its a medical student. The paper says that it is the third such incident at AIIMS and goes on to show how tough AIIMs is. It almost sounds as if they are out to produce commandos. This was a doctor cum student.

On the third page, there is a article Maths terror; just take it easy. I fail to understand why it is a terror in the first place? Except for people who want to phd in maths or science, how much maths is used anyway and when there are computers to do the job, why allow kids to kill themselves?. I feel strongly about this because I came close to killing myself for the same reason but it was all foolish because I have verbal talent. Why should everybody be good at maths? My brother in law is very good at numbers but cannot write for toffee. Can a computer write like a poet? The article goes on to suggest yoga and pranayam but that is all nonsense. The root of the peoblem is the education system. I know from three sources that brain patterns form from the age of 7-14 and it is or 5-12 and they are not easy to reverse irrespective of psychologists talking about cognitive reconditioning. Let us see what Osho Rajneesh says

The teacher goes on telling to the small children, Give attention to me. Be attentive. They are attentive. But they are attentive somewhere else. A cuckoo is crying his heart outside the school building and the child is attentive. Nobody can say that he is not attentive. Nobody can say that he is not meditative. Nobody can say that he is in deep concentration. He is . In fact, he has completely forgotten the teacher and the arithmetic that he is doing on the board. He is completely oblivious. He is completely possessed by the cuckoo. The child is attentive. It is happening naturally. Listening to the cuckoo he is happy. The teacher is distracting and the teacher says that you are not attentive. He is simply stating a lie. The child was attentive. The cuckoo was more attractive to him. The teacher was not so attractive. The arithmetic has no such appeal. But we are not all born to be mathematicians. There are few children who will not be interested in the cuckoo. The cuckoo may go on madder and madder and they will be attentive to the blackboard. Then Arithmetic is for them. Then they have a meditation, a natural meditative state. People who choose the butterfly and the cuckoo are deemed rich because they are happy. This type of man will never need any method to concentrate. Because he is in concentration. His concentration is spread all over his life. Twenty four hours he is in concentration.

Albert Einstein has himself admitted, "The hardest thing in the world to understand is Incom-tax". Should he have also committed suicide?

As a child I was like this but forced to do maths. I would love to force a mathematician into writing poetry or for that matter force the IIT ians and the so called intelligent people do face a board exam of music and fine arts. They would then realize how much intelligence it requires to be deemed dumb.

Mathematics apart, another stupid obsession in our education system is memory. I did a crash course MBA program from the International management Institute for work experienced people. There they had open book exams, role plays, case studies group discussions etc and that was the most enjoyable year of education.. How much memory do you need in practical life and people tend to remember more of what they are interested in. Even that boss of mine who got six promotions in one year and had a brilliant memory used to write each and everything-all tasks minutely. In knowledge management books, its clearly given that application is more important; one wonders why open book exams are not there then-they would also unearth real talent and that is what we do in real life in any case- look for info on the net or in books and apply. To hell with memory. It unnecessarily burdens children and is detrimental to real education.

It is said that Experience is a hard teacher. It takes the test first and gives the lesson afterwards. Being a life and death issue,here there cannot be any lesson; there is a test and then permanent rest and therefore prevention is the best. It is said that Without danger, one cannot go beyond danger . I hope the concerned authorities are not waiting before the students start committing suicides in their thousands instead of tens or hundreds before they take action. Unlike TA, here there is only one indicator but is more than enough to justify prompt action.
 
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