This was posted by Mr Gehi lal int the india-isses forum. I found it quite interesting and hillarious:-
I found the quips about Bihar and the Ambassador very funny
Place: Two Americans at IBM , USA .
Currency Conversion Rate: Re 1/- = $100/-.
Alex: Hi John, you didnt come yesterday to office?
John: Yeah, I was in Indian Embassy for stamping.
Alex: Oh really, what happened, I heard that nowadays it has become
very strict.
John: Yeah, but I managed to get it.
Alex: How long it took to get it stamped?
John: Oh, it was nasty man, long queue. Bill Gates was standing
in front of me and they played with him like anything. Thats why it
got delayed. I went there at 2 am itself and waited and returned by 4
pm .
Alex: Really? In India , it is a matter of an hour to get stamped for
USA
John: Yeah, but that is because who in India will be interested in
coming to USA man, their economy has been booming.
Alex: So, when are you leaving?
John: Anytime, after receiving my tickets from the client in India
and you know, I will be getting a chance to fly Air-India. Sort of
dream come true.
Alex: How long are you going to stay in India ?
John: What do you mean by how long? I will be settled in India , my
company has promised me that they will process my Hara Patta.. (green card)
Alex: Really, lucky person man, it is very difficult to get a Hara
Patta in India .
John: Yeah, thats why; I am planning to marry an Indian girl there.
Alex: But you can find lots of US girls in Chennai, Bangalore and
Mumbai.
John: But, I prefer Indian girls because they are beautiful and
CULTURED
Alex: Where did you get the offer, Chennai?
John: Yeah, salary is good there, but cost of living is quite high,
it is Rs. 1000/- for a single room accommodation.
Alex: I see, thats too much for US people, Rs.1/- =$100/-. Oh God!
What about in Bangalore , Mumbai?
John: No idea, but it is less than what we have in Chennai. It is
like the world headquarters of software
Alex: I heard, almost all the Indians are having one personal Robot
for help.
John: You can get a BMW car for Rs. 5000/-, and a personal Robot for
less than Rs.7500/-. But my dream is to purchase Ambassador, which
costs Rs.2, 00,000/- but has got a lovely design.
Alex: By the way, who is your client?
John: Iyer and Iyengar Associates, a pure Indian company,
specializing in Embedded Software.
Alex: Oh, really, lucky to work in a pure Indian company. They are
really intelligent and unlike American Body shoppers who have opened
their Fly-by-night outfits in India . Indian companies pay you in full
even when you are on bench.
My friend Paul Allen, it seems, used his bench time to visit Bihar ,
the most livable place in India , probably world. There you have full
freedom and no restrictions. You can do whatever you want! I wonder
how that state has perfected that system.
John: Yeah man! You are right. I hope our America also follows their
footsteps.
Alex: How are you going to cope with their language?
John: Why not? >From my school days I have been learning Hindi as my
first language here at New York . At the Consulate they tested my
proficiency in Hindi and were quite impressed by my cent percent
score in TOHIL i.e. Test of Hindi as International Language.
Alex: So, you are going to have fun there.
John: Yeah, I will be traveling in the worlds fastest train,
worlds largest theme park, and the famous Bollywood where you can
see actors like, Hrithik, Shah Rukh Khan and all. Esselworld is also
near Bollywood.
Alex: You know, the PM is scheduled to visit US next year; he may
then relax the number of visas.
John: Thats true. Last month, Narayana Murthy visited White House
and donated Rs. 2000/- for infrastructure development at Silicon
Valley and has promised more if we follow the model of High-Tech City
of Hyderabad. Bill Gates also got a chance of meeting him. Very lucky
person.
Alex: But, Indian government is planning to split Narayanamurthys
Infosys.
John: He is a hard worker man; he can build any number of Infosys
like this. Every minute he is getting Rs. 1000/-. It seems, if you
keep all his money converted as Rs. 100/- notes you can reach Pluto.
Alex: OK, Good Luck John.
John: Same to you Alex. And dont go to Consulate in a "Kurta Pyjama"
because they will think you are too indianised and may doubt you will
never come back and hence your Non-Immigrant Visa may get rejected.
But dont forget to say " Namaste, aap kaise hai " to the Visa
officer at Window 5. It seems he likes that and will not give you a
visa if you dont greet him that way.
Dont think it is a dream...
Let us work hard to make this dream come true.
"At my will mountains will crumble up.
Have that sort of energy, that sort of will; work hard,
And you will reach the goal".
Currency Conversion Rate: Re 1/- = $100/-.
Alex: Hi John, you didnt come yesterday to office?
John: Yeah, I was in Indian Embassy for stamping.
Alex: Oh really, what happened, I heard that nowadays it has become
very strict.
John: Yeah, but I managed to get it.
Alex: How long it took to get it stamped?
John: Oh, it was nasty man, long queue. Bill Gates was standing
in front of me and they played with him like anything. Thats why it
got delayed. I went there at 2 am itself and waited and returned by 4
pm .
Alex: Really? In India , it is a matter of an hour to get stamped for
USA
John: Yeah, but that is because who in India will be interested in
coming to USA man, their economy has been booming.
Alex: So, when are you leaving?
John: Anytime, after receiving my tickets from the client in India
and you know, I will be getting a chance to fly Air-India. Sort of
dream come true.
Alex: How long are you going to stay in India ?
John: What do you mean by how long? I will be settled in India , my
company has promised me that they will process my Hara Patta.. (green card)
Alex: Really, lucky person man, it is very difficult to get a Hara
Patta in India .
John: Yeah, thats why; I am planning to marry an Indian girl there.
Alex: But you can find lots of US girls in Chennai, Bangalore and
Mumbai.
John: But, I prefer Indian girls because they are beautiful and
CULTURED
Alex: Where did you get the offer, Chennai?
John: Yeah, salary is good there, but cost of living is quite high,
it is Rs. 1000/- for a single room accommodation.
Alex: I see, thats too much for US people, Rs.1/- =$100/-. Oh God!
What about in Bangalore , Mumbai?
John: No idea, but it is less than what we have in Chennai. It is
like the world headquarters of software
Alex: I heard, almost all the Indians are having one personal Robot
for help.
John: You can get a BMW car for Rs. 5000/-, and a personal Robot for
less than Rs.7500/-. But my dream is to purchase Ambassador, which
costs Rs.2, 00,000/- but has got a lovely design.
Alex: By the way, who is your client?
John: Iyer and Iyengar Associates, a pure Indian company,
specializing in Embedded Software.
Alex: Oh, really, lucky to work in a pure Indian company. They are
really intelligent and unlike American Body shoppers who have opened
their Fly-by-night outfits in India . Indian companies pay you in full
even when you are on bench.
My friend Paul Allen, it seems, used his bench time to visit Bihar ,
the most livable place in India , probably world. There you have full
freedom and no restrictions. You can do whatever you want! I wonder
how that state has perfected that system.
John: Yeah man! You are right. I hope our America also follows their
footsteps.
Alex: How are you going to cope with their language?
John: Why not? >From my school days I have been learning Hindi as my
first language here at New York . At the Consulate they tested my
proficiency in Hindi and were quite impressed by my cent percent
score in TOHIL i.e. Test of Hindi as International Language.
Alex: So, you are going to have fun there.
John: Yeah, I will be traveling in the worlds fastest train,
worlds largest theme park, and the famous Bollywood where you can
see actors like, Hrithik, Shah Rukh Khan and all. Esselworld is also
near Bollywood.
Alex: You know, the PM is scheduled to visit US next year; he may
then relax the number of visas.
John: Thats true. Last month, Narayana Murthy visited White House
and donated Rs. 2000/- for infrastructure development at Silicon
Valley and has promised more if we follow the model of High-Tech City
of Hyderabad. Bill Gates also got a chance of meeting him. Very lucky
person.
Alex: But, Indian government is planning to split Narayanamurthys
Infosys.
John: He is a hard worker man; he can build any number of Infosys
like this. Every minute he is getting Rs. 1000/-. It seems, if you
keep all his money converted as Rs. 100/- notes you can reach Pluto.
Alex: OK, Good Luck John.
John: Same to you Alex. And dont go to Consulate in a "Kurta Pyjama"
because they will think you are too indianised and may doubt you will
never come back and hence your Non-Immigrant Visa may get rejected.
But dont forget to say " Namaste, aap kaise hai " to the Visa
officer at Window 5. It seems he likes that and will not give you a
visa if you dont greet him that way.
Dont think it is a dream...
Let us work hard to make this dream come true.
"At my will mountains will crumble up.
Have that sort of energy, that sort of will; work hard,
And you will reach the goal".
