Collected from the Net

#1
A woman in a faded gingham dress and her husband, dressed in a homespun

threadbare suit, stepped off the train in Boston, and walked timidly,

without an appointment, into the Harvard University President's outer

office.

The secretary could tell in a moment that such backwoods, country

hicks had no business at Harvard and probably didn't even deserve to be in Cambridge.

"We want to see The President," the man said softly.

"He'll be busy all day," the secretary snapped.

"We'll wait," the woman replied.

For hours, the secretary ignored them, hoping that the couple would

finally become discouraged and go away. They didn't and the secretary grew

frustrated and finally decided to disturb the president, even though it was a

chore she always regretted.

"Maybe if you see them for a few minutes, they'll leave," she said to him.

He sighed in exasperation and nodded. Someone of his importance

obviously didn't have the time to spend with them, but he detested gingham

dresses and homespun suits cluttering up his outer office. The president, stern

faced and with dignity, strutted toward the couple.

The woman explained, "We had a son who attended Harvard for one year.

He loved Harvard. He was happy here. But about a year ago, he was

accidentally killed. My husband and I would like to erect a memorial, somewhere on

campus, for him."

The president wasn't touched; he was surprised. "Madam," he said,

gruffly, "we can't put up a statue for every person who attended Harvard and

died.

If we did, this place would look like a cemetery."

"Oh, no," the woman explained quickly. "We don't want to erect a

statue.

We thought we would like to give a building to Harvard."

The president rolled his eyes. He glanced at the gingham dress and

homespun suit, then exclaimed, "A building! Do you have any earthly idea how

much a building costs? We have over seven and a half million dollars in the

physical buildings alone here at Harvard."

For a moment, the woman was silent. The president was pleased. Maybe

he could get rid of them now. The woman turned to her husband and said quietly,

"Is that all it costs to start a university? Why don't we just start our own?" Her husband nodded.

The president's face wilted in bewilderment.

Mr. and Mrs. Leland Stanford got up and walked away, traveling to Palo Alto,

California, where they established the university that bears their name,

Stanford University, a memorial to a son that Harvard no longer cared

about.
 
#4
Thank you Saint and Vince. Here is another anecdote which, like the previous one, is supposedly true:

An atheist professor of philosophy speaks to his
class on the problem science has with God, The Almighty.

He asks one of his new students to stand and.....

Prof: So you believe in God?

Student: Absolutely, sir.

Prof: Is God good?

Student: Sure.

Prof: Is God all-powerful?

Student: Yes.

Prof: My brother died of cancer even though he prayed
to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn't.
How is this God good then? Hmm?

(Student is silent.)

Prof: You can't answer, can you? Let's start again,
young fella. Is God
good?

Student: Yes.

Prof: Is Satan good?

Student: No.

Prof: Where does Satan come from?

Student: From...God...

Prof: That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this
world?

Student: Yes.

Prof: Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did make
everything. Correct?

Student: Yes.

Prof: So who created evil?

(Student does not answer.)

Prof: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness?
All these terrible things exist in the world, don't they?

Student: Yes, sir.

Prof: So, who created them?

(Student has no answer.)

Prof: Science says you have 5 senses you use to
identify and observe
the world around you. Tell me, son...Have you ever

seen God?

Student: No, sir.

Prof: Tell us if you have ever heard your God?

Student: No, sir.

Prof: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God,
smelt your

God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God
for that matter?

Student: No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.

Prof: Yet you still believe in Him?

Student: Yes.

Prof: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable
protocol, science says your GOD doesn't exist. What do you say to that,
son?

Student: Nothing. I only have my faith.

Prof: Yes. Faith. And that is the problem science has.

Student: Professor, is there such a thing as heat?

Prof: Yes.

Student: And is there such a thing as cold?

Prof: Yes.

Student: No sir. There isn't.

(The lecture theatre becomes very quiet with this turn
of events.)

Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little
heat or no heat. But we don't have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is
no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to
describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.

(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture theatre.)

Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such
a thing as darkness?


Prof: Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?

Student : You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the
absence of something. You can have low light, normal light,bright light, flashing light....But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? In reality, darkness isn't. If it
were you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?

Prof: So what is the point you are making, young man?

Student: Sir, my point is your philosophical premise
is flawed.

Prof: Flawed? Can you explain how?

Student: Sir, you are working on the premise of
duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite,something we can measure.
Sir, science can't even explain a thought. It uses
electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully
understood either one.To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that
death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is
not the opposite of life: just the absence of it.

Now tell me, Professor.Do you teach your students that
they evolved from a monkey?

Prof: If you are referring to the natural evolutionary
process, yes, of course, I do.

Student: Have you ever observed evolution with your
own eyes, sir?

(The Professor shakes his head with a smile, beginning
to realize where the argument is going.)

Student: Since no one has ever observed the process of
evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an
on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a
preacher? (The class is in uproar.)

Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever
seen the Professor's brain?

(The class breaks out into laughter.)

Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the
Professor's brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical,stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain,sir.

With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your
lectures, sir?

(The room is silent. The professor stares at the
student, his face
unfathomable.)

Prof: I guess you'll have to take them on faith, son.

Student: That is it sir... The link between man & god
is FAITH. That is all that keeps things moving & alive.

The student was none other than.........APJ Abdul Kalam, the present president of India .
 
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#5
IAS questions

Q.How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
A.Concrete floors are very hard to crack! (UPSC Topper)


Q.If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall,how long would it take
four men to build it?
A. No time at all it is already built. (UPSC 23 Rank Opted for IFS)


Q.If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four
apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?

A. Very large hands.(Good one) (UPSC 11 Rank Opted for IPS)


Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one
hand. (UPSC Rank 14 Opted for IES)


Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep?
A. No Probs , He sleeps at night. (UPSC IAS Rank 98)


Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?
A. It will Wet or Sink as simple as that. (UPSC IAS Rank 2)


Q. What looks like half apple ?
A : The other half. (UPSC - IAS Topper )


Q. What can you never eat for breakfast ?
A : Dinner.


Q. What happened when wheel was invented ?
A : It caused a revolution.

Q. Bay of Bengal is in which state?
A : Liquid (UPSC 33Rank )
 
#6
Hello Debraj,
As ususal ---u r at ur very best ---when collecting the goodies from the Net---ur's "Professor - Student Dialouge" is truely Awesome---
Being a teacher of Maths and Physics myself----I had different conflicting opinions----in different times in the past few yrs----I was like that silly Professor at one time---and like the enlightened student at a few other times---(courtsey---Sri Sri Ravi Shankar---founder and CEO(in todays words)
of Art of Living(AOL))
But then ---to analyse---Neither the Professor was totally wrong---neither the Student entirely right----Miracles do exist---But then --- todays physics has advanced a lot---Quantam Mechanics ,String Theory--And the recent other developments----r all poing towards the simultaneous existing of a particle in the same time instant---in two distinct modes---one particular spin and its antispin respectively---which may somewhat explain the coexistance of the good and the bad--the heaven and the hell---and other diabolical antiparallel characteristics---none of them can be studied in isolation probably---
Maybe in the near Future---Science may come to a more probablistic better answer---An Answer ---which may had been desifered---by our ancient Sages---in the Vedanta---since times immemorial!!!
Regards,
joy_mitali
 
#7
Take a moment with each of the three steps below.


Step 1: If your eyes follow the movement of the rotating pink dot, you will only see one color, pink.

Step 2: If you stare at the black + in the center, the moving dot turns to green.

Step 3: Now, concentrate on the black + in the center of the picture. {Stare at it without batting your eyelids.} After a short period of time, all the pink dots will slowly disappear, and you will only see a green dot rotating.
 

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#8
Debraj said:
A woman in a faded gingham dress and her husband, dressed in a homespun
------ many lines deleted ------

The president's face wilted in bewilderment.

Mr. and Mrs. Leland Stanford got up and walked away, traveling to Palo Alto,

California, where they established the university that bears their name,

Stanford University, a memorial to a son that Harvard no longer cared

about.

This is an urban legend

http://www.harvard.edu/siteguide/faqs/faq19.html
 
#9
# Sign on a railway station at Patna:
Aana free, jaana free,
Pakde gaye to khana free.


# Seen on a famous beauty parlor in Bombay:
Don't whistle at the girl going out from here.
She may be your grandmother!


# Seen on a bulletin board:
Success is relative
More the success, more the relatives.

# Sign at a barber's saloon in Juhu, Bombay:
We need your heads to run our business.

# A traffic slogan:
Don't let your kids drive if they are not old enough - or else they never will be.....


#THE BEST ONE:
It's God's responsibility to forgive the terrorist organizations.
It's our responsibility to arrange the meeting between them and God."
- Indian Armed Forces
 

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